The Next 45 Days.

There is a Storm brewing.

Within the next 45 days you or I may not recognize who I am (Video to come).

Like ⏰️ clock work this Beast from beyond turns itself on and leaves me and my family in disarray and a feeling of hopelessness for up to two months.

It is the Dark 🌩 Cloud of a Major Depression making its way forward.

Just a precursor;

👉 Bipolar Disorder results in 9.2 years reduction in expected life span, and as many as one in five patients with a Bipolar Disorder completes suicide. (National Institute of Mental Health)

👉 Individuals with Bipolar II disorder can be depressed for longer periods, which can cause significant impairment

Now let the slow rhythmic drum beat begin.

Please buckle your belts as this may be bumpy ride.

It starts slowly.

👊 First.

It starts by attacking my energy level and zaps it like a focused laser beam.

This leaves me rolled up in a ball trying to reactivate my engine and hoping to find it’s spark.

Just as an example, I can be fine one moment on a Saturday morning and almost suddenly I need to sit down as my Big Brain (to which I will refer to it throughout this article) fogs up, zaps my energy and puts me into a sleep coma for the rest of the day. 

The only cure is a deep sleep that can last 10+ hours and puts a kink into any plans I had with the family or to be productive that day.

This is not the case and the whole weekend is lost.

What brought this on?

Who the F⭐️ck knows.

And if I did know I would definitely put up my defense system and fight it.

But unfortunately at this moment my Spidey Senses are letting me down.

👊🏽 Second.

My memory starts lapsing. 

One day I will remember how to drive to a certain location the next it will be like it never happened.

I will forget where I park in a parking lot.

Or take this for an example; I did meet you last year and when we meet again this year I will have totally forgotten that we have met.

Or….ooops I already forgot what I was going to say 🤣.

👊🏼 Third.

I start losing weight as I have no appetite. 

This maybe a good thing if I can afford to lose weight, but at this moment with the cockatail of drugs I am on, this is already doing it’s job.

My blood sugar goes out of whack because I start eating like crap and only want what will keep me happy for a moment or two to which is a sugar

Every time I fall into this state my endocrinologist agrees that I need to throw caution to the wind and do best for my survival.

It is a conundrum of a trade off…..High Blood Sugar or Survival Mode 😳.

I choose Survival Mode.

👊🏿 Fourth.

My hygiene schedule goes out of whack.

This is one area I push myself the hardest to stay in control and the only recognizable factor to you that I am going through is that I am letting my hair grow like a Chia Pet.

My wife thinks this is (and so do I) the funniest tell tale sign as it starts happening weeks before my Big Brain starts to fizzle.

😎 So here it is.

As in the past years I have put up a good fight as to not letting others know what is happening as I have a Family and Job to take care of…

… but it is ever so exhausting. 

The countdown is now on 3️⃣2️⃣1️⃣ 🚀

I am hoping it will be different this year as I am on a new drug called Lamotrigine and so far I have seen some positive changes.

…but the Devil maybe coming out of the shadows as my hair has started to grow past the usual starting line 🤯.

It’s fight night.

Let the dice drop where they may.

✊️ And here’s to seeing you on the other side of making it through this Storm as I prepare to fight like never before.

🙏🙏🏽🙏🏼 𝗣𝘀: 𝗜𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝗲𝗲 𝗮 ☕ 𝗖𝗼𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗲 𝗖𝘂𝗽 𝗶𝗰𝗼𝗻 𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗽𝗮𝗴𝗲, 𝗽𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗱𝗼𝗻’𝘁 𝗯𝗲 𝗮𝗳𝗿𝗮𝗶𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗰𝗹𝗶𝗰𝗸 𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗕𝘂𝘆 𝗠𝗲 𝗮 𝗖𝗼𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗲 𝗮𝘀 𝗶𝘁 𝘀𝘂𝗽𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗼𝗳 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗜 𝗱𝗼 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗯𝗼𝘁𝗵 𝗺𝘆 𝗥𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗴𝗮𝗱𝗲 𝗦𝗶𝘁𝗲𝘀.

And as always,

Have a PHENOMENAL 🤩 Day. 

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